-- Intellectual Quality of America Online Users --

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Well, I suppose I deserve to justify my own existence with Aol so I won't sound like a hypocrite. The only reason I have an AOl account is that It is my parents primary internet connection in New Orleans and I just created an account for myself down there. Now I have no real problem with the majority of Aol Users. I think Aol does provide a valuble service and does give 'common' people an easy way to access the internet. Unfortunatly, within this myriad and complex assortement of 'common' users, there is also a contingent of utter and complete morons. I was sitting online with my Aol Instant messenger because I have several friends who are on Aol, when this Nikolay 10 person started harassing me because I enjoy reading books...Below is the entire corresponence with this intellectual master....

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Nikolay 10: Hi, I wanted to tell you that books are pretty cool but also
dunb. what do you think about books?
Sploorky: umm....your odd
Sploorky: you're, rather
Sploorky: ...and what, exactly, is dunb?
Nikolay 10: Well first of all your dunb than the dunb books.
Sploorky: excuse me?
Nikolay 10: well are you dumb because you are reading books so that
automaticaly makes you dumb.
Sploorky: have you ever read a book?
Nikolay 10: yes it is called ''you are an ripped ediot''
Sploorky: "an ripped ediot," eh?
Sploorky: never had the pleasure
Nikolay 10: well what stupid book did you read dumb ass?
Sploorky: a brief history of time - steven hawking, the final three
minutes, conjectures about the ultimate fate of the universe, ender's
game,entire pern series, entire xanth series, most everythingw ritten by
robert jordan and orson scott card...well those are my favorite 'dumb'
books.
Nikolay 10: you are a smarty pants guy so to you I'v got to say bye ediot.
Sploorky: by the way, it is spelled idiot
Sploorky: hmm
Nikolay 10: your gay so adios gay boy
Sploorky: why am i gay?
Nikolay 10: you read books
Sploorky: are you implying that only gay people have intellegence?
Nikolay 10: no but you are one weird man
Sploorky: by your grand logic, you must not be gay and therefore not
intellegent
Nikolay 10: hey man I'm intellegant so buzz of man
Sploorky: I am not the one who cannot spell and does not have the proper
respect for the intellectual medium which has carried the human race
through 5000 years of development
Sploorky: so you are a homosexual?
Sploorky: you have admitted to being intellegent
Sploorky: so by your own logic you must be a homosexual
Sploorky: is this ture?
Sploorky: ahem sorry slip up there...i meant true
Nikolay 10: no but you are and you are a mother fucker
Sploorky: Actually, anyone who has ever fathered a child can correctly be
labeled a 'mother fucker' as you so quaintly put it
Sploorky: and in being a 'mother fucker' that would acutomatically
disqualify someone from being a homosexual
Sploorky: so, am i gay or am i a 'mother fucker
Sploorky: ?
Nikolay 10: you are a bitch, fucker,and you are gay
Sploorky: so i am not a 'mother fucker'. I see. Thank you for your insight
into such slang. Now i am assuming that you do not mean 'bitch' as the
strictly clinical definition of a female dog.
Sploorky: right?
Nikolay 10: iok right i'm sorry what i said i just wanted to have fun but
i have yo go so bye
Sploorky: please learn to spell before you harass people on the internet.
Go outside. have fun. Stay away from this community of people who have
chosen to communicate through an electronic medium. Stick with your own
intellectual group.

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Ah, once again my hopes and dreams about the ultimate fate of humanity have been restored. We are all Screwed if too many people like this can exist in the universe....